i have an exam in the morning that im not sure im gonna pass.
im not sure about a lot of things but it seems to me it hurts more not trying at all than trying and failing.
I've done alot of the trial and error in my life and i don't regret it all because i am who i am now because of my failures.
it seems that people are wrapped up in the flashy everywhere i go there's references to swag and ballin and flashin and trickn. dont even get it twisted, im all about the celebratory. because im a happy person generally. but im not an out of touch person. that is not the reality of life, for most of us things are not that easy. hard work is necessary,determination is needed. no fucking joke i sometimes feel like locking myself in my car and screaming for hours. because i see what i want but the path that leads to it is foggy
i slept all day today. all day. i had somewhere near 7 dreams.every time i woke i wished i could go back to the last dream. life is not cake. as of now i declare myself DEPRESSED. I'm tired of everything i don't find joy in anything at all. whats living without motivation.
something funny? knowing I'm depressed makes it all the more real that i WILL NOT stay this way forever. ill overcome it. because its what i do.
reality is reality people but how would you know? we live in the VH1 generation where even reality television is scripted.
2 comments:
Hmmm...you're not alone. Trust, there are other people who have felt what you're feeling, and also see through the veils of vanity.
Hopefully, knowing that will at least offer some help in your recovery from your current predicament. I pray that you get better, and I pray that things in this world get better so that people with their eyes open won't have them weary at the end of each day from viewing inconsistencies and whatnot from the slop that we are visually/audially/subconsciously fed to us from all angles.
Peace,
image.in.
i thought hard about it. and my solution is creatiing my own reality. realizing that there will always be a put down around the corner has conditioned me into a person who has to create her own happy and her own sad. someone who deals with things in her own way.
and while i cant ignore injustice ill give my own form of it.
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